So it looks like jason is leaving in less than 2 weeks. in less than 2 weeks the army is taking my husband away from me, taking him away from our kids, our life. And what for? so he can report the news back to our country and the dumbass american media who gets it wrong anyway. If u think about it, jas is going to be getting shot and possibly blown up so that some jackass newscaster here can twist the footage and news that he spillt his blood for to boost ratings. I know, i know, its probably not going to be that bad, but prepare for the worst, hope for the best right? I've got a 4-5 months where he is stateside before i even have to worry bout it at least. Thats tough, knowing your husband is in the same country, u can call him, yet you cant see him, cant touch him, but he's safe for awhile. Welcome to the army, hurry up and wait. I'll admit the last deployment pushed me to the point i felt like i was going to break. I'll give some of the credit to pregnancy hormones, i guess they mess ya up huh? He was safe then though, he wasnt anywhere near fighting, he just sat in a tower, read, played games, and was bored. This time he starts in danger and follows it, goes to where news is, that definitely doesnt help me sleep.
I'll be honest with myself, there is the chance of him coming home in a body bag, we've talked about it. What scares the snot outta me, is that he's prepared himself for that, he's ok if God calls him back. I'm proud of him for that, i really am, i admire him, but i fight tears as i ask myself if he's prepared and ready cause something WILL happen to him? Its a situation i never want to have to think about or deal with, i couldnt do it, i couldnt handle it. We are tapping what connections we've got to try to keep him home, i am way to uneasy this time around. Jas was supposed to be done with the military last month, we were supposed to have our lives back, i pray we can get it back! Can i just skip this part of my life?
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